LOVE, DEATH
I’m afraid of dying
not having experienced love
I’ve had a couple crushes
none of them answered
all my friends having these boyfriends
if not, at least lots of sex
I’m not having any of that, and I worry…
Regarding sex, I might be the problem
if my tastes were more grounded…
But love, you can’t look for it on your phone
I might be a bit traditional in that sense
I don’t want to keep being alone, I’m afraid
just as I’ve been for the past years
I don’t know, these looked like better years
to be gay
in case that’s the problem…
would it be the same if I was straight?
my father is, and he wasn’t lucky
with women. Not lucky in general…
Cause’ if I die now,
it’s sad that my dreams die with me
but it would be ok
cause’ I’ve laughed, I’ve danced
I’ve done shit with friends, good times
I’ve travelled, watched movies all day
I tried my best, and I’ve cried
I’ve felt enough, I feel like more days
would just be the same
so I don’t mind saying goodbye
but please, not before I love someone
and that someone loves me.
To die before, that would be a fucking mess
cause that would really feel
like a waste of time and flesh
I’LL ONLY BE FREE WHEN MY PARENTS DIE
I’ll only be free when my parents die
lately I’ve been thinking about this a lot
not because I want my parents to die
but because it is the only way I’d stop
feeling judged, or like I owe something
if my parents died, I’d be free
the world to be walked, just the way I’d want
not feeling sorry, for ending up as a failure
if that’s the ending written for me
no more prisons of duty
no more forced relations to labor
only the person who’s me
dying the way I’d want as I live
sick sad nation 